Ep. 81 The Wildly Creative + Embodied Healing Journey w/ Nkem Chukwumerije
What does healing feel like in the body? Is it a linear process? How do folx access healing through creating and putting those creations out to the world? Teaching artist, healing artist, and creative entrepreneur, Nkem Chukwumerije is in the studio today sharing their journey of healing and going public. We chat about:
The cyclical nature of the healing journey
Sensual embodiment + creativity
Using the medium of the moment to create + process
Inviting others into liberation + healing through many different modalities
And SO much more. If you’re in the process of becoming, like all of us humans are, but you’re wanting to get more intentioned with it… this episode is for you.
Connect with Nkem:
i: https://www.instagram.com/wellspringwords/
https://www.instagram.com/naturallyfree123/
w: https://www.wellspringwords.love/
Follow Carin on Insta: @carinhuebner
Join the email list: https://portal.carinhuebner.com/public/form/view/62a7a9056cfde7fd9ad9d018
BOOK YOUR PODCASTING DISCOVERY CALL: https://portal.carinhuebner.com/public/appointment-scheduler/6424b2c60ea51ee627d8a250/schedule
Transcript:
(this is an AI generated transcript and therefore contains ALL kinds of errors)
Hey everybody, thanks so much for being here again at Heal and Go Public. I am so thrilled to have another amazing guest with you today. I have just gotten to connect with this person through some networking events, and we had a call last week that it just left me so thrilled and so thankful for the opportunities to connect with people through virtual spaces, the internet connecting us together. But otherwise, I would've never gotten to connect with this person. We also got to share some poetry, some alignment as far as creative process and helping other folks find themselves and a deeper sense of themselves through creative process of creative work, as well as some dialogue around healing self and healing society through healing self as well. So I'm really, really excited for this conversation today. My guest today is in chem Ku Marije in chem pronouns.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
She, they as a teaching artist, healing artists and creative entrepreneurs specializing in holistic wellness and creative embodiment. She has lived in six countries and has traveled through 30 plus exploring herself and life through spiritual, creative needs. Her style of being in the world is intentional, passionate, idealistic, trauma-informed, pleasure centered, and wisdom centered. These attributes are woven throughout her art projects, the programs she creates, and the way she works with her communities. She's a writing teacher of 11 plus years and a yoga teacher highlighting how our bodies are portals to unique wisdom and deeper authenticity through her work and passions in chem, hopes other beings will gain a deeper relation to themselves, a sense of community and more access to aha moments leading them to greater personal and spiritual enlightenment. And Kim, I get goosebumps even just reading that You're an incredible being and I'm so thankful that you're here.
Speaker 3 (03:26):
Thank you for having me. Wow. Wow. What an intro. I mean, I know I wrote the intro about myself, but having you read it and just feel it, that feels good, and it feels good to hear because you bring all of yourself into this space where someone can try and understand you. So it's nice to feel understood. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
Thank you for being here, and thank you for that incredible bio. Is there anything in that bio that's missing today or do you want to share with us?
Speaker 3 (03:52):
I think right now what may, it's not missing, but this aspect of being a beginner, like loving New Beginnings. I love New Beginnings. I should probably throw that in there, but it's quite long already, so,
Speaker 2 (04:06):
Oh, I love it. That's so beautiful. That's literally, I'm in a reiki training program right now, and our practice for this week is I'm a beginner and it's been so beautiful and wonderful and also so challenging. I am learning to love beginnings. I'm learning to love being a beginner at things, and it is so contradictory to the culture that I have been conditioned in and the past narratives that I've been given. So I love and appreciate that that is, comes so natural to you now at this point that you want it in your bio as well. Yeah, I love it. And Ken, I would just love to hear a little bit about, let's call it your healing journey. I mean, how have you gotten to where you're now, and we'll start with you personally as far as your healing and going public journey, and then we'll dive into all of the wonderful and amazing work that you do with folks. So let's start with your healing journey. How do you feel through creativity or through life, or what does your healing journey look like?
Speaker 3 (05:06):
Wow. Yeah, and it's one of those, it's a spiraling thing for those who appreciate the visuals. I see my healing journey as a spiral because it has this sense of the cyclical nature of coming back to certain concepts, certain versions of self, certain ideas and thoughts, but also looking at the same things or being in a place you once were in a new way because there's always a learning happening. So to kind of ground that is something real or my lived experience, I don't know. I think there was always this aspect of me that enjoyed transformation, enjoyed creating things, destroying things, creating things, and so I always had my hands in some things since I was a kid, just always making something, always considered myself, an artist, a designer, and always seeing the beauty in life or wanting to have, wanting to put my hands in the pot while it's cooking.
Speaker 3 (06:00):
That's kind of how things work for me. It doesn't always work out that way. Sometimes you have to let things be, which is, maybe we'll get into it a little bit later, but the whole balance that my healing journey has brought me to understand. But initially, essentially I have that idea of putting my hands in the pot while something is cooking. I want to feel what it's like for things to be in process being made, but this understanding of healing as that transformative force rather than maybe creativity or art. As that transformative force came not too long ago, around 2020, that is when I had some articulation around what was happening. Something was happening and I needed to gather tools to support myself because certain things were rising and I was learning myself in a new way. This was during the beginning of the pandemic, things started really changing and I started finding myself in my own.
Speaker 3 (06:52):
I was working full-time at university, teaching writing, and at that time I was teaching writing that was very cognitive, very upper chakra, but kind of limited. We weren't going into the soulful spiritual where we were staying more and even the philosophical, we didn't touch as much in the program that I worked in. It was more academic. So there was like, yes, you're in the brain, you're in the mind, you're thinking, but you're not really creating larger ideas or looking into that beyond space. So I found myself doing that on the side. I was teaching in one way, and then everything that I felt that I couldn't necessarily teach in that way, I would explore it myself. And then I think that process of curiosity and the mixture of that very wild time in life and all the energies that were happening just opened up this portal to healing portal, to understanding self in a new way, in a renewed way.
Speaker 3 (07:43):
But my human self was like, I'm dying. I think I even told a friend at that time, I was like, I feel like I'm dying. I whispered it to her. I was sitting on her bed next to her. I was like, I feel like I'm dying. She was like, what? I was like, but spiritually, I didn't even understand what I was saying. I didn't even know what I was saying at the time, but I knew that something was happening and that was the feeling that was coming. So shortly after that, I decided to really take my artistic journey into a direction where I could focus on myself as an artist, but I was also deepening in and healing journey, which I didn't really articulate the healing stuff so much. I mean, I didn't have language for that as much as I had language for my artistic journey, my creative process.
Speaker 3 (08:27):
I've always been in creative industry in some way, even if it was in a more corporate environment. But there's that creative element that was always there. So I said, Hey, I'm going to leave this. I was living in Abu Dhabi at the time. That's where I was working at the university. I left that environment and then I moved to Mexico. I had saved up money because I wanted to do this nomadic solo travel thing. I'd been doing it already in some form or fashion, but I was more so connected with other institutions, other people that brought me to different countries. There I would work and I would live and whatever, love life and whatever. But this time, this transition in 20 20, 20 21 from Abu Dhabi to Mexico, I was like, yeah, I'm not going to tether myself to anything physical. I'm just going to find out what it's like to do it on my own.
Speaker 3 (09:14):
What's it, my life, my art, my writing at that point, you read in my bio, I've been a writing teacher for a really long time, but I was really focused on other people and other people's helping other people with their writing and their own creative processing and learning through them in that capacity. But having that direct practice and that intention to cultivate practice with myself came when I made that transition a few years ago. And then the healing really started. Then I started to receive and put myself in positions to receive language and tools for healing process, because I was doing a yoga teacher training at the time, and then I started studying Qigong, which I'm still, I mean, everything. When you start studying these things and do a training, the studying is forever. You just say, I'm hopping on this train and I'm never getting off.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Because you can always go deeper and deeper, and you practice on yourself. You practice in the world, and you practice on yourself. At least that's how I take it. So of course, because I'm not just learning to learn, which is beautiful, but in these cases, I was learning to teach. So embodiment of these things was so, so important for me, and that meant that I needed to document, this was the instruction for my teachers as well, and just the natural way I do things. Going through some process, I need to document what I'm feeling after this practice document how it felt, and then I started to track my menstrual cycle during those periods as well, just to learn how to move with my more internal cycles as opposed to these external conditions and responsibilities and all of these notions placed on how life should be.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
Well, what do my cycles tell me? There's this thing happening within me every single month and I can't talk about it. Why can't I talk about how I really want to talk about it? So yes, in the process of all of this healing and navigating life, learning to navigate life in a different way, a more artistic way that feels natural to me. I've stumbled upon some resources and some community for menstrual cycle awareness, and then when I started doing my yoga teacher training, I got in touch with understanding the elemental way of being. I mean, for me, all of this, my exploration really comes down to the fact that I'm an African woman and this is just, it's in my bones, it's in bred in me, and I just don't have the language to speak to my existence from the African perspective, from my ancient original roots because of colonization, because of immigration, because of being in this country born and bred.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
But I'll find the language that I can find that I'm resonant with, and then one day everything will make more sense. But that's how I see it now. But yes, coming back to my healing process, the healing part really started when I was engaging in these training programs and learning about what was happening within what's happening societally as human beings from the anatomical all the way to the energetic, to the societal, to the relational. And then I have this huge language background, of course, and so I bring that in. But yeah, then I know we are meant to be focusing on my healing journey, but at some point, my healing journey and the way I support others, they just come into the same frame and they're one in the same. So maybe I'll just pause there for now.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Perfect. Thank you so much for that also, and thank you for giving us a little bit of a picture into your journey and what has looked like a little bit. One thing that I think of too is that for my graduate thesis, I created a spiritual journey model that was based in the artist creative process. So that really big kind of view as far as we are continually creating ourselves as well as we're continually creating these artworks. And I think something that I've learned in the last handful of years, also as I've opened up to more freedom and choice and agency in my own life, is that we're constantly creating our own lives as well. And it sounds like you've been on a journey of, you've maybe known some of those things from a really young age and have allowed yourself as pursued against all other things, the life that you desire to have through experience and the healing that you've desired to have through these healing modalities and access points as well. So just to reflect and admire that as well.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
You mentioned embodiment, and so I just want to wonder around that for a second because I know that it's such a massive part of what you offer to folks and a part of your own journey, especially thinking of qang yoga, even the creative act of painting, drawing, all of those things can be when we're unified with our body, can be really embodied experiences. Is that something like you mentioned that is ingrained in you and something that you always knew that you knew, but was something that you had been separated from as far as embodiment or your own body? Or is that something that's always come really naturally for you?
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Well, I think yes to both. It's always come really naturally, and it has been something ingrained come naturally. But yes, a separation, having a separation from that, what comes so naturally to me is miraculous. It has the potential to be miraculous for yourself and for others. If you can wrap your intention around the way that you tap into this gift or this connection point thing that you do, this activity, this practice, if your intention can be there in the right way, oh, you're set, baby girl. You don't have to be searching anywhere for anything. You've got it. And I think when it comes to, I'll put this also in the frame of my healing journey and give specific examples because yeah, I think just it's very easy to talk from the level of thinking about the healing journey without getting into the nitty gritty, and I think it could be helpful for that.
Speaker 3 (15:04):
And when it comes to the body and the embodiment practice, let me speak specifically on sensual embodiment because that's one of my favorite places to play. Of course, it's the favorite place to play because it's the place of play, it's the place of pleasure, and we have this continuum that I consider it from shame to pleasure moving from shame to pleasure. It's all existing within your body and our embodied experiences naturally. If we take away the whole idea of creative embodiment, how are we being in our bodies? And we just consider our experiences in our bodies, the experiences that I had in my body, especially concerning pleasure, sexual pleasure, sensual pleasure, they were objectified, commodified. There was always some other, I always felt other eyes in certain contexts. The only place I felt really free to be my fully embodied, sensual, creative. I want to start screaming right now because that's just how primal and embodied I feel was when I'm with my girls dancing and just having a good old time don't come and talk to me.
Speaker 3 (16:14):
Not that I just want to dance and feeling free in that we're all doing our thing. Of course, that feels super natural and can be a portal to the supernatural. Okay, yes. But the minute that is taken out of that honest, pure context, and it's like now it's for, you're doing that to create a sexual tension or pleasure for other people, but it no longer has to do with me in that case. Now my responsibility is around other people and how they respond when I'm in my element and I'm removing the focus from me completely. Okay. So that's been my experience. That was my experience when I was younger. So it was kind of very, very strange, and it's all very intertwined with some nastiness and a lot of energy that's not mine that's passed down, and maybe some people can relate to that feeling, this energy of shame.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
This ain't my shame. What am I ashamed about? What am I ashamed just being alive? This is not mine. It's other people's stories. It's this, the inability to talk about what my body is experiencing or what I'm experiencing through my body, and maybe I don't have the language for it, but you should know, mom, you should know because you're my mom and why can't I talk to you about these kinds of things? Why can't I open up to you? And then that desire to want to connect in that way through the body, at some point you kind of outsource that and you no longer have this connection with yourself, or I no longer have this connection with myself that I needed to reclaim in some aspect through my sensuality. And I think I had some moments where I was like, why should I need to reclaim something that has always come so naturally to me whenever I'm dancing by myself or with people who I feel safe and comfortable around, or even just by myself if people are watching me, but I'm not dancing for you when I'm in that element, it feels natural.
Speaker 3 (18:01):
So what really is there to reclaim? But there's so much more than just the act of, I learned this in my practice of dance, of connecting with myself energetically through dance. There's so much more than just the act of dancing. There's so much more going on within and so much more that, like I said earlier, with intention, if you're able to wield that or direct that in a certain way, you can release so much, you can experience this kind of liberation that maybe you never knew that you could have access to. So when you first experience it, you're scared at the sensation it's not right. It can't be right. No baby. It's the only right thing. You've just allowed yourself to open up into that. And I'm saying you because it's like myself telling me, but also me telling someone, you or someone else who's listening, it's like again, a certain kind of continuum where we're just talking to each other and we're supporting ourselves and supporting each other. So yeah. Now the way that that comes into play is I treat my embodiment practice, especially the essential embodiment practice as a treat.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
This is a treat. I want to experience this connection with myself, and I know how powerful it is to be able to go to those places within my body. I mean, maybe perhaps because of my training as well, knowing the anatomy, knowing the energetic anatomy, knowing what these things signify emotionally and how to connect it with the moon, how to connect with my cycles to really do trans mutational work. That's part of it. That's super exciting to me, and I love it. So I can go there. But I think for maybe those listening who are in this experience of wanting to reconnect with their bodies or understand what can embodiment look like for me, or have this inclination towards a sensual, sexual, energetic experience, especially if you're an artistic creative person now, you're going to have that connection. I just feel it. Just being able to take ourselves to the place of shame potentially, I think is a place to begin this exploration. I can be open to shame. I can be open to my shame and then take it from there.
Speaker 2 (20:07):
Yeah, that absolutely makes sense as a starting point, because so many of the coping things and so many of the habits and so many of those things are keeping us from entering that space of shape and acknowledging it and getting close to it because it feels fucking terrifying and it feels so true. All of those past narratives, which let's shout out to, I'll shout out all of those past narratives. Majority of them come from, especially in this context and this culture, white supremacy culture, and also in the past work that I've done as far as being a bridge director from religious oppression and religious trauma, that is still under that whole umbrella if we're so, just to shout that out. And I love that you used the word liberation as far as, I mean that's the work that you're doing right for yourself and for others is creating access to liberation and getting more acquainted with, I mean that shame, entering into that shame allows us to enter into that broader dialogue of choice, agency power, all of those things, right?
Speaker 1 (21:15):
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Speaker 2 (23:32):
I also hear you said ages ago, the word balance, and I know that this word is important to you as well. How do you, through your healing journey, I mean you mentioned it around your healing journey, and especially when art, creativity, especially more creative writing, not the less heady writing into something different that the word balance came up. Can you define, can you give us your definition of balance and maybe some thoughts there?
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Okay, yeah. Another word that may resonate in this aspect is harmony. I think it just matters. How does it resonate with you, balance or harmony? Some people, they're triggered by balance because then this perfectionism comes up and then sometimes harmony feels better because then it allows for things to flow a little bit more. So it's maybe what I mean, a little bit more of the harmony. I knew that I was out of balance at a certain point, but I didn't know how to get back into balance. And for me, what being out of balance meant was that my energy centers were I balance. I knew, I mean, if I feel so extreme towards anything, I'm out of balance. I'm out of harmony. I shouldn't be feeling so extreme. But I knew extreme. I know intensity so well for those who resonate. I've got a Leo Stelli, I've got four planets, and Leo, I've also got four entities, let's call 'em.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
Some of them are asteroids in Pisces. So there's a lot of passionate, deep fire flowing energy all the time. I can flow, I can go, I can flow, I can go. When it comes to creative wellness or this creative embodiment piece that flowing, going, flowing, going all the time was taking me away from being able to feel secure, inner security, not necessarily being secure in a physical place. I mean, I was nomadic for a while, so I didn't have that sense of security, but that was only mirrored by my inability to feel secure and I belong in a place because I was in that flowing going as opposed to having more of a harmony or balance between staying and being and flowing and going. So it became important because it was impacting my physical health. I couldn't feel settled, and there were a lot of physical implications for that specifically with my heart.
Speaker 3 (25:47):
But that's why the healing had to happen because it's like I had to move through that cycle of always being on the go, truly understanding, coming to understand why this was harmful for me to always be in that space, harmful, physically harmful relationally with my social connections, harmful for my mind, my self-esteem, to always be in that space without having any grounding. And I also find it important when it comes to the artistic and creative process, because for those of us who love to flow, not everybody who's an artist who identifies as a creative person or an artist loves flowing. They like to be in the flow. Maybe they like structure or they really feel connected with this logical way of doing things, and there's a certain kind of flow, but it's not the flowing. I'm just like a fire mermaid, let's say. That is it.
Speaker 3 (26:41):
It's a different kind of flow, but everything benefits from the other. So being the fire mermaid and having that flow go, it still benefits to have that level of intention there. Intention is coming up again, because for me, intention provides a structure. It's not something that keeps me boxed in or caged in or doesn't allow me to be curious or explore or learn new tricks and flips in the water, but it does help me direct what this energy is doing. And then when it's time to direct it in a different way, then I know how to pivot because I have that harmony there with being able to be still, you can't pivot without being still first. There's that aspect. And of course on the other side, if you're someone who really loves the logical piece of doing things and getting things in order, there is a benefit to have a little bit of play in there because you learn new things and you expand yourself.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
Yes, yes, absolutely. And I just think of two, one of the most massive lessons or practices in my life that I continually have to learn also is that limitations create a lot of flow for me. So I'm predominantly a fire sign, and I will just burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn. And I'm a Vata also, and so I can just fly away and having to create discipline or I mean my best and most productive, most productive, whatever, most prolific eras of creating were. When I had set studio time every day, every week, even if we weren't studio time was like, I can read my books in my studio, I can listen to music in my studios, but we're in the fucking studio, right? So that's one of my big soapboxes, especially with past clients and even with podcast clients, is we need some sort of limitation, scaffolding framework. We need some sort of discipline control element,
Speaker 3 (28:32):
Intention,
Speaker 2 (28:33):
Yes intention in order to explode that creativity in an intended direction. And that feels so true of the healing journey. Also, as far as we can hone in on these methodologies that give us scaffolding and understanding that also then allows things to kind of explode or flow out of it as well. I love it.
Speaker 3 (28:59):
Me too.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
Can you tell us a little bit more, so you've mentioned writing. I just want to know, what are your media of choice as far as your own creation processes, like your own creative expression?
Speaker 3 (29:13):
Yeah, there's so many, because it depends on what I want to do at the moment. It depends on what part of me needs nourishment, I guess is one way to see it. And also, what am I creating for? What's the
Speaker 2 (29:28):
Intention?
Speaker 3 (29:30):
Interesting. Yeah, sometimes I'm working on a project. For instance, I have a couple of books that I'm working on. I have poetry collection that I'm putting together and a novel that I wrote that I'm editing and very creative. I'll be in a creative space, but mentally creative, and sometimes I crave that. I don't know, the right side of my mouth is having a sensation right now that usually has when I have that craving. How interesting. And then there are other times where it's like, I just need to dance, man. I just want to put on a playlist. I just want to dance. I just want to shake my ass. I want to make a dance just for myself, just so I can practice the dance that I'm making for myself. These kinds of things. It's all about satisfaction
Speaker 3 (30:08):
For those who resonate with human design. I'm a generator, and I think our thing is about being satisfied. I can't really remember that sense of fulfillment or being satisfied. That's how we know we're in alignment. And yeah, there are times when I'm just really not satisfied and I'm feeling like frustrated even if I'm not doing that vocally. Sometimes I might, but I feel that, and I'm like, what do I need now? What would make me feel connected with life, connected with my life here? Not someone else's life that they just thrust on me. I'm the second born daughter of a family, which is what I am.
Speaker 3 (30:44):
And so there's writing always, it's available, either free writing, just getting my thoughts out, poetry, play, writing short stories, just little snippets, whatever, just channeling whatever I'm processing, whatever I want to explore into words. There's singing, painting. I like to have everything near me so that way I can just pick and choose. There's beating, there's crochet. Anything that satisfies what I need at the moment. And sometimes I really need to get into my hands, especially if I'm in a lower period or a premenstrual. I'm feeling more sensitive. I'm overthinking a lot. I'm really in that inner space just flowing through, and I can't really stay focused on what's happening outside of me, but I can crochet a baby blanket because everybody's having babies all the time, and babies need blankets, and I can do that because then I can really process things as I'm just doing this very repetitive movement, and that is, of course, a creative act that just keeps me grounded and not too floaty in my head. So those are a couple of different examples. I think really it's just about being able to give myself what I need.
Speaker 2 (31:46):
Beautiful. There was a massive shift for me personally when I shifted. My life had a very different purpose than this, but when I shifted into noticing that I was drawn to living a fulfilled life, oh my God, everything shifted. My power shifted, my agency shifted. My choice shifted what I could do with my artwork, shifted everything. Whereas before I had been given that the purpose of my life was this, a religious context was evangelism or to please this certain kind of God that I was given. And so being able to break that down, and I'm playing with the word fulfillment, you're using satisfaction, and I feel like those are related, but different. But what that provides access to, especially in how you're able to live your life and what you're able to do is so incredibly beautiful using your hands piece. I feel like you said, even within the menstrual cycle, but I feel like even in seasons of life also when I was in graduate school, there was so much head stuff happening. There was so many concepts and philosophies and all of that that it was like, I have got to do something with my hands. I just wanted, and I worked in a welding shop for a while because I was like, this is the best. I move the metal. I cut the metal. It
Speaker 3 (33:04):
Feels good
Speaker 2 (33:05):
To us. And it felt powerful too, which was really important, being in the context that I was in my specific graduate school, which was, anyway, I've mentioned it before, but being in a religious context where women weren't supposed to speak and all of these things, but to be in a welding shop where sparks are flying and I'm knowing my power of my own body and all of
Speaker 3 (33:26):
That. Yeah, sounds powerful.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yes. Which also, and I only see these things in hindsight, right? I'm working to begin seeing these things as they're happening. But something else too that you've talked about is when I would get stuck, I used to get super stuck in any of my writing for the podcast or my emails for marketing or anything like that. And I would be like, okay, pause button. We're going to dance. We got to dance it out. And literally even just like three, five minutes, one song, two songs, any amount of just moving with it would provide so much clarity, confidence. I was probably lacking confidence and letting all of those narratives rush in. And then I also talk about too, who's in the studio with us. I had probably let some people in the studio that didn't need to be there and through dancing was reclaiming that space as far as, no, you're not in the studio.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
This is mine. This is me. So just really resonating with that body movement and that embodied piece as far as what our bodies can give to us too, as far as through movement and access. I want to pivot a little bit here, and I'm tempted to pivot because of order and everything. We talked about healing for so long. I'm tempted to go to going public what your going public journey has looked like, but I'm also recognizing how intertwined that might be with the services that you offer and how you work with people. So what has it looked like for you? I mean, knowing that this podcast is heal and go public, knowing that anybody that's creating some sort of wild and wonderful offering out into the world, it gets out to people. And so many of us, I mean, you talked about human design before. Some of us have that channel that we not only just create art for ourselves, but we have to share it with the world also. What has going public looked like for you?
Speaker 3 (35:14):
Going public for me has looked like there's so many things, but I guess I'll say this one, needing to see myself differently, needing to meet myself differently. It's a necessity. It's not going to work if you still, I don't know. There were a lot of ways that I saw myself or considered myself, and I didn't really have my two eyes on me all the time in the past. And that was super disorienting for being a public facing person, which is why I wasn't a public facing person. I had projects I would share with people, and they would do well. I wouldn't put any pressure on anything, and they would just organically do what they needed to do, be shared with who they needed to be shared, because I was just creating for myself and living my life and the way that I was living it.
Speaker 3 (36:03):
But moving into a space of intentionally being public with how I'm living, it is a certain reclamation for me of I like to be seen. I'm good when I'm seen. I eye candy in a certain kind of way for certain people who feel connected to me, my aesthetic, and not really just focusing too much on aesthetic for aesthetics purposes, it's Libra season. So I had some thoughts about aesthetics and everything this morning during meditation in relation to this season in relation to Venetian Venus Beauty and what that translates to for people, for myself and for other people. And my chart is rule. If I look in Vedic astrology, my chart is ruled by Venus. So I learned that recently. I was like, that makes a lot of sense, but it's also something that's very strong in my heart about experiencing beauty, being beauty, being beautiful, and not physically necessarily only, but allowing the beauty to shine through in the way that I show up for myself, with myself, and just letting that be what it is for the world.
Speaker 3 (37:10):
And because I know that it feels good for me to be seen in this pure way, this honest way. I need to get real with myself about the why and really disentangle all of those being seen for being seen purposes and the validation needed from other people to be okay, being seen, needing permission for other people to show up in my fullness, in my authenticity as I am and be beautiful because we have a choice. We have a choice if we want to be beautiful or if we want to take it into a slightly different direction. I'm saying slightly different direction because being beautiful is when you show up in your confidence and you could allow for energy to move through in a way that's authentic for you, trust and believe. When somebody is in that position, they will be radiating and they will be beautiful.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
They'll be beautiful in their own way. And so we have that choice to do that, or we have, I know it's challenging to say choice because a lot of the things that hold us back from being in that vibration, we don't feel like we have choice over it. And they certainly are vibrational, and they certainly do feel physical, and they certainly feel difficult to move through. So when I say we have that choice, maybe I'm just saying that there is that option that's available that we can work to align ourselves with that pathway and we can get support to align ourselves with that pathway. I think that's a fairer way to put it, or we can take it in a slightly different direction, which is to continue to align with the things that pull us back into shame, into those false narratives about what it is, show up and be authentic and raw and imperfect, but perfect in a certain kind of way.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
Yeah. So my journey to going public, sometimes I have felt, should I really, maybe it was too soon. Maybe I shouldn't have been out there doing all that like that. But I know that in the moment when I said yes to whatever that was, maybe it was a podcast, maybe it was a piece that I put out. I'm saying I'm honoring how I am who I am in this moment. I don't get to decide that I'm going to have this beautiful, amazing, delicious life till I'm 80 years old. Sometimes life just comes and snatches you away. So today is what I'm honoring. Whatever I'm experiencing right now is what I'm honoring through this poem. And I didn't study poetry in school. I took one class, but you know what I mean? I didn't study. Go deep into that in school. I wrote a poem and I'm sharing it on my website, and I'm sharing it with those who want to read it.
Speaker 3 (39:35):
And then maybe I'll look back and be like, girl, take that down. But there will always be a stronger part of me that says, you're not taking anything down. Because what we need more of in this life is seeing the journey of transformation. I consider my own, for instance, my Instagram account. There's some stuff on there. Nothing can really make me cringe. Yeah, sure. Certain things are like, okay, fine. I knew who I was then. Whatever. It's not really who I am now, but I need to be her. I need to honor her. I need to let her live in the way that she has lived. And for me to look through all those years of having this Instagram page, what I cared about, who I was, how my essence was showing itself through those pictures, those captions, how I captured life all the way up until now, and to see how my artistry has grown through, how I continue to have the courage to put myself out there and show myself. So there's that aspect of me going public through my own expressions, my own projects. And then there's the aspect of me going public through sharing the work that I do, because the work that I do is very connected to my own journey of creative exploration and allowing your life force to shine in this world, essentially. Yes,
Speaker 2 (40:45):
Absolutely. Oh, thank you. Yes. And that's something I talk about a lot and talk about with friends and business a lot also, is that having and owning a business or being an entrepreneur is a naturally transformative process. Also, everything, all of my statements, all of my issues are coming into the room of my business with me, right? Everything is there with me and all of my past narratives, my shame, all of that impacts how I make decisions in my business and also my healing journey. All of that impacts how I make decisions or how I move or how I go public and all of these things. So I appreciate you kind of naming that, and then, gosh, just thank you, but let's pivot. Okay, we're here. Alas, we're here. So it's such a natural segue also to what you do with folks. So how do you help others heal and go public or heal and or go public also?
Speaker 3 (41:39):
Yeah. My intention is to support people around the world on their practice and their journey of practicing their authentic creative expression. So it started off with just the writing piece of it, because in the beginning when I started to position myself in this life as this support person, as it were, that was what I felt the most comfortable with. We could do writing all day, any part of it, just give it to me. I give it back to you, we'll play with it. It's easy done. Then life was inviting me into more. So now that has opened up into beyond just the writing. That's one part of it. So I love working with writers because the specific mindset and specific identity, specific experience, the way that we interpret life is through a specific way when we're really wanting to process it through word and use word as this wielding of magic essentially.
Speaker 3 (42:33):
But there are so many other ways to do it. So through dance, I'm just saying the ways that I have worked with folks and what I'm really open to, because I'm flexible and I'm open, there are guaranteed ways that I work with people, which I'll share. But then these are just the ways, anything that has to do with allowing our creative energy to flow through us. So I've led dance classes in the past. Essential creative, embodiment dance class was very fun. I did that in Mexico City, and that one allowed me to work from behind the scenes. I consider it energetics, the energetics of creative life force and flow and alignment, harmony, all of these things, and working to channel that into our work. But primarily how I support people is through writing. So I'm a writing coach, writing and creative expression coach writing and creative embodiment coach.
Speaker 3 (43:22):
It really depends on what my client wants to move through and what they're open to. Because if people want to go down the embodiment path and we want to do this energetic exploration through the time that we work together, let's go there. But if it's really about focusing on what's coming through, then let's stay where you want to stay. But there's always room to go deeper, is the way that I see it. And then secondly is really working with the energy through creative embodiment sessions, let's call them. I love those sessions because they provide space for our own creative exploration, whatever it is, I'm bringing in all my tools, essentially bring in all the tools. Let's have so much fun with this and let's see where we want to flow. And this is where the intuitive nature of my process really comes in very handy.
Speaker 3 (44:05):
It comes in handy in everything, but especially in these places because we can see what's arising, how do we support ourselves through that, through a healing process. How do we make the healing process feel like it is truly a self-care process and not necessarily something the healing can be a beautiful thing to be with rather than it being something like, oh, I've hurt myself now I have to go and heal. I'm in healing, period. I don't have the words for it exactly right now, but turns out to be a beautiful thing. So yeah, the work with writing and the work with creative embodiment, this is what I love to do, and then I'm open. I'm so open to how to support people. I mean multidisciplinary, multidimensional artist over here. So when it comes to writing your books, putting together poetry, understanding what poetry means for you in your life, I think what I'm coming to understand about the way that I work with the world and work with people and work with myself, it's like let's take our life to another dimension. You know what I mean? Let's take our life to another dimension of fulfillment and really learn how to practice our creative authority around how we take in life and what we produce. And that flow of taking in life and producing and feeling. This is a big one, feeling our essence through everything. I want to feel myself through everything that I'm doing, everything that I'm creating. So I'll use any tools that I have access to, and I'll go and train for some more. I will do it. And then let's work together. I'm here for that.
Speaker 2 (45:37):
Yes, thank you for that. And too, and Kim, if anybody's interested in any of that and working with you or collaborating with you in any way, how can they get in touch with you or how can they follow your journey if they're not ready to work with you or collaborate or they just want to know you more?
Speaker 3 (45:51):
Right? Yes. Thank you. So in terms of all the writing, if there's a platform, I didn't even mention a platform. See, there's a lot going on multidimensional, like I mentioned, you just forget to say stuff. But the platform is a digital anthology, a wellness space in a virtual writing studio. It's called Wellspring Words, and you can find us on Instagram at wellspring words. That's probably a great hub. But also the platform itself is www wellspring words love, and we have everything there, all our offerings, all the coaching, the writing courses, online workshops, anything, the podcast, wellspring words, the podcast, anything that you want you could find or you can request. And then personally, you could find me on Instagram at naturally free 1, 2, 3, and my website is buy in chem.co. And then I'm just open for meaningful conversations to see where things lead.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
Amazing. Thank you so much for that. And all of those links will be in the show notes as well. But in Kem, I'm just so thankful for this dialogue today and so much wisdom and so much of your experience that you've dropped on us as well. Thank you. And I'm just thrilled every time we speak, and I feel very connected with you as far as being artist, creatives and women in this world. And I admire the work that you're doing so much, and I admire. I know that it has not been easy and light and that it comes at a cost. I mean, as far as all of the work that you have done to get to where you are now is just, I want to say a gift, but I also don't want to demean it, right? It's incredibly beautiful to sit with you.
Speaker 3 (47:22):
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (47:23):
You're incredibly beautiful, your life and your person and everything. So just thank you so much for being here. I hope every listeners, if you feel a connection to Chem, please go connect with her and see what she's up to. And I'm sure that that will continually change and grow and expand as they have allowed themselves to continually expand. So thank you for being here.
Speaker 3 (47:45):
Thank you so much, Karen. It's been a pleasure and a lot of the stuff that I've shared is the first time coming through, so I always appreciate conversations like this because they allow for some new expressions to come through. Thank you so much. Thank
Speaker 2 (47:59):
You. Thank you for honoring me in that way. Thank you.
Speaker 1 (48:06):
Hey, creator, I'm glad you're here. Healing through creating and going public with our wild and wonderful creations is challenging, but I'm here for you and I'm totally with you in a sense. I'm you. Head over to the website@karenhenry.com or the show notes to get on the email list. By being on my email list, you receive more from me all about healing through creating and connecting through going public, and you get to follow along and allow me to be your creative guide on how I heal and go public as a creator. Join me head to karen hiner.com. That's C-A-R-I-N-H-U-E-B-N-E r.com, or head to the show notes to get on that email list. Thanks for listening. And don't forget, hit that rate and review button while you're here. I would love your feedback, and it helps other people find the show so that they can feel like they have a creative guide on this healing and go public journey. Thanks for being here. Bye.